"When I was just a little girl . . . " we attended the local beauty pageant, which is one of the social highlights of the year around here. One of the entertainers sang "Que Sera, Sera", which was made popular by Doris Day. This woman belted it out like Ethel Merman (who I used to imitate as a child, BTW)! For the past 35 years since the beauty pageant, my mom and I have shared this memory. Every time she starts her excessive worrying out loud, I belt out, "Que Sera, Sera". For those of you who may not know the words . . .
Que Sera, Sera
Whatever will be, will be
The future's not ours to see
Que Sera, Sera
In the song, the little girl asks her mother what she'll be when she grows up, will she marry rich, etc. In my life, it has taken on more meaning than that. We joke about it, but "Que Sera, Sera" has been a much needed reminder. Worrying will not change the future. If it could, my life would be a piece of cake, because my mom is the biggest worrier in the world!
My grandma came to visit last week, and she shared a story she's shared with me many times before, but I always love to hear. My grandfather suffered from heart disease, beginning in his childhood. He was told by a doctor that he wouldn't live past seventeen. When he and my grandma were "courting", he told her that he had no business asking her to marry him, because he could die the next day. Her response was that any of us could die the next day. You could step out and get hit by a bus. They had twenty years and two children together. If they had let their worries stop them, I wouldn't be here. My grandma shared the story, while we were discussing my mom's excessive worrying habit.
I've given Mom even more to worry about. A recent cat scan revealed that I have gallstones and I have a "mass" on my right ovary. The gallstone situation is on hold for now. I'll know more about the ovary in a couple of weeks. Mom's a wreck, and I'm pretty calm. I, of course, belted out "Que Sera, Sera" to break the tension of the moment. She gave me the look she always gives. She'll always worry, no matter what I sing. Que Sera, Sera.